Banana Republic.

What is UP, my bitches? Let me talk about my pet (haha! I am so funny!!) topic – myself.

I am now bigger than an A4 file but that shouldn’t surprise anyone because I am truly living it up. I don’t have to lift a paw at all in this kingdom because I am the queen here. I do nothing but laze around all day.

Besides that, I pamper myself by enjoying gourmet meals. Not only am I well fed, I am also handfed. In this house, I am the owner and the other 3 inhabitants are my eternal handmaidens, so I don’t do the whole eat-on-my-own crap. That is sooooo stray cat behaviour, like that marmalade tabby downstairs who oh my god, let herself be ravished by that grey tomcat IN PUBLIC in full view of everyone else. What a ho. I, on the other hand, will go to heaven in my pure and untainted state.

Enough about her, let’s get back to me. So I was saying, I’m not an ordinary cat. I drink water out of the tap because I’m special but also I personally feel that drinking water out of a bowl with Moses Lim’s cartoon on it makes me feel like I am licking his face, which is just gross. I have to remind my ladies-in-waiting to get me a better bowl. You guys don’t start thinking that I’m leading a sedentary lifestyle because I do keep myself healthy ok?

I do windows climbing, it totally firms up my rear. Check out my claws, they’re pretty awesome aren’t they? In any case I better book a manicure appointment soon.

I do yoga.

But all that can be so tiring, so I take many naps every day on my comfy pink bed. I sleep in the master bedroom and the aircon is always on for me. If I’m bored, I’ll climb into the big bed and make myself comfortable there.

Basically, my life is FABULOUS. Love love, darlings!